Help?

[memento1]

Okay, I need your input. My co-workers are organizing giving a gift to our boss in thanks for all the hard work she did organizing for shows and the conference last week. They want to buy her yoga lessons and split the cost: $25 each. I don't even LIKE my boss, but that's a whole 'nother topic. The thing is, $25 is a lot of money to me. This job is only part-time, with crappy pay and no benefits. Most of my co-workers are married and have extra income that way, but I'm struggling to get by - I can't even afford health insurance (as I'm sure you've heard me complain before). I appreciate my boss' hard work, but I need that money for basic necessities. *sigh* So anyway, I can technically cop out and not put in my share, but I feel guilted into it. It makes me sound like a cheapskate if I don't at least donate some. And the things is, they do this regularly: take a co-worker or an intern out to celebrate, bring in food for special occasions. And I want to be a part of it but I'm the only one struggling to make it by, and I hate feeling guilted into this stuff that is so easy for everyone else with disposable income. So I'm thinking maybe I'll donate some but not the full $25 as a compromise. So, ummm...advice? What is the correct thing to do here?

In TV news, new Bones on tonight! SQUEEEE!!! I've been waiting all week for this. I can't hope for anything like last week, but I'll take just a bit of cuteness. Really. I'm dying here. And pu-lease, if you've already seen it, don't say anything. The House premiere was a great engaging story, and does great as a stand-alone, but I'm wondering how they will make his new attitude work moving forward. He's just not House without the cynical, grumpy disinterest. But it was a good 2 hours. And I'm going to give Glee and Castle a try - I wasn't interested enough to carve time out of my schedule for it, but with a DVR I plan to see what all the hype's about. The one episode of Glee I watched was a little juvenile, but cute, and enough to make me try more.

Comments

[lunayoshi.livejournal.com]

I'm going to go with classic Dear Abby advice and say donate what you can, and if you can't, explain that while you appreciate her efforts, it's just not feasible for you to cough up $25 at this point due to the sucktastic economy. If they actually assume you'll donate no matter what and get mad at you for not doing so or being stingy, then wow, they're not worth the stress.

House WAS good. I was thinking it was going to be boring as all hell, but dang if our returning shows haven't done great on their premiers. My boyfriend's sister recognized the rapping/manic depressive guy from some musical production she knew. Apparently he's an award-winning actor in theatre and music? I forget exactly what, but she thought he was awesome.

The problem with Thursdays is ... it's a long time until Monday. Grrr, I don't wanna wait! Want my shows now plz. c_c After Bones tonight, I'ma be all sad for a few days. Suck.

[memento1.livejournal.com]

I think that's what I'm gonna do - tell them I'll just donate a little because money is tight right now. Bah.

I was pleasantly surprised by House. It disappointed me a lot last season so I wasn't very excited about the premiere, but it was really good. I like that they left the normal format to do something completely different and meaningful. The secondary characters were wonderful. I didn't recognize the rapper, but I'm not surprised he's award-winning, because he was good.

[txduck.livejournal.com]

I'd say give what you can afford... I'm sure everyone has been, at one time or another, in the same place financially as you are now (I know I have) they should understand.

Bones: Wooo Hooo

Also... I like Glee (for the music mostly) but I love Castle, course I'm a sucker for the whole cop/drama/comedy/sexual tension thing ;)

[memento1.livejournal.com]

Well, I'm a sucker for Nathan Fillion. Add in the cop/drama/comedy/sexual tension and I'm a gonner. ;)

[naushika.livejournal.com]

Maybe I'm a jerk, but I wouldn't donate anything. Even when I have spare cash, if I am going to give it away, I give it away to people who really deserve it or who I do like. But especially in tight times, I just can't toss away my money on an ephemeral gift to someone I don't like.

I would just tell them what you've said here. "Times are very tight for me right now, and I just can't afford to pitch in." Did you get to vote on what to give the boss for a present? Did you even vote on whether to give a present at all? Or did you coworkers just say "We all decided to give this present, now chip in $25?" Don't feel guilty, because you had nothing to do with this. The only correct thing to do is be true to yourself!

When I worked at Bank of America, it was very similar. A lot of the women were making tons of money because this was a side job they did for extra cash, because their husbands were the breadwinners. I know that once you start chipping in for these things, they're not going to take no for an answer in the future. "Why can't you chip in for X this month? Last month you helped pay for X." and so on.

Oops, my bitterness is really showing here! Like I said, I have experience with this type of atmosphere, and it's really frustrating to deal with people who have no concept of what being poor is like. It must be very nice for them!

All bitching aside.. I AM SO EXCITED ABOUT NEW BONES TONIGHT! :D Last week's episode was great, yayyyy.

Glee is a pretty fun show. It's quite silly, and the song/dance numbers are overly scripted, but the story is very funny.

[memento1.livejournal.com]

Haha, I love you Noelle. Yay for standing up and being a jerk. ;) I'm glad SOMEONE knows how it feels. It does make you very bitter. Anyways, thanks for backing me up here. Makes me feel a whole lot less guilty about being stingy.

Hee BONES! What did we do to deserve that premiere, eh?

I have to agree with you on Glee. It's silly and unbelievable at times, but quirky and fun.

[hoshinekoyasha.livejournal.com]

I'd put in $5-10, idk.

Watch Bones Canadian time!

[memento1.livejournal.com]

I don't want to watch it Canadian time! I'm a stickler for waiting it out to watch live, with commercials and everything. It's...a ritual. *L*

[wendelah1]

I think you need to tell whoever the ringleader is for this sort of present-giving that you simply can't afford it on the part-time, low wage you make. Your circumstances aren't unusual, once you get a full-time job there, or elsewhere, you'll be able to participate as an equal. I also think it's unfair for parents to bring in these fundraiser books and expect other people to help subsidize their kid's education. Man, can that add up. And my goodness, I almost forgot the charity walk/run/pogostick-athons.

[memento1.livejournal.com]

They were understanding, which of course does not ease my guilt at all. Bah.

And OMG yes, all the fundraisers and walkathons and everything...it never ends.

[bayareajenn.livejournal.com]

Hi!!

I gotta go ahead and agree with naushika on this one, with a small caveat. First, if you can't afford it, and/or you don't really want to, then don't donate. If you do want to, and you can afford $5, then go ahead. BUT you should talk to your coworkers and explain to them. I mean, how much do you make an hour? I'm guessing $25 is at least more than one hour's work and you don't work full-time, right? So the math for you is pretty easy. You don't have to tell them that. Just tell them that this is your only job, your single, you've only entered the job market recently, this job is only part-time and just barely covers your bills. You don't have extra money for a movie or a dinner out, much less to contribute to stuff like this on a regular basis. Stress that you'd really LIKE to help out and be a part of things, but that you're sure they'll understand since everyone was just starting out at some point in their lives. I'm certain they've been there themselves; we all have. Don't stress over this, hon. They will understand, and they will be sympathetic if you tell explain things to them.

Btw, can you e-mail me your e-mail address and your physical address? There's something I want to send you. I'm switching to gmail, btw, so my gmail addy is turbojenn at gmail dot com.

[memento1.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much for your advice, Jenn. You always make me feel better about making these hard decisions. I did tell them I could just donate a bit and they were very understanding, which is good but doesn't ease my guilt at all. There's just no winning.

I try to always keep my latest contact info in my LJ Memories under "Contact Info", but I'll e-mail you too.

[erries.livejournal.com]

The House premiere was great! I can't wait to see what they do with his new attitude (i.e. if it sticks!) once he goes back to the hospital.

[memento1.livejournal.com]

It will be intriguing, definitely. The show did need a mix-up...it was getting a little stale with the same old format every week.